So far, I have been pursuing acting in Los Angeles. Waiting around for motivation is much more like it. I have spent the past six years jumping from lousy roommate to lousy roommate to tiny one bedroom apartment. Don’t get me wrong, I love my life. I have great friends and the freedom to do whatever I want. I also have two part-time jobs and no time for a real life.
I’m tired of living the in the part-time.
It’s time to start thinking about the future. I want more than this life. I’ve always known that acting was what I wanted to do, even when I was a kid. But now, that I’m really living in the world, it seems like an ill fit. For an actor, the mechanics of it are pretty easy. Stand here, hit this mark, and remember your lines. You don’t even have to cry, they have glycerin drops for that. Sounds great, right? Until you hear Julianne Moore say that she feels like actresses are paid not to eat. Until you hear about the horrible plastic surgery mishaps that lead to misshapen faces, different sized breasts, scars, and even death. Until you hear that girls as young as fifteen are being told to lose weight or that a beautiful nineteen year old girl who is a size two has been told she “carries too much weight in her hips”. Until you hear that the man who told her that is a record producer who is also her boyfriend. Until you hear someone utter Stanley Tucci’s line “six is the new fourteen” and mean it.
Everything in this town seems to be part-time. You meet people here and are instantly “good friends”. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve heard, “oh, my friend so and so,” come to find out, they met once in a bar. I have met so many people who have cried, “We should definitely hang out, give me your number and we’ll get together”. I know they are plans we’ll never keep, but why do we even say we’re interested?
Most people I know can’t even commit to a relationship full-time. The last guy I “dated” had three girlfriends in the time that we were “hanging out”. Others just want someone to sleep with to pass the time. Don’t get me wrong, casual sex can be fun, but it seems like all anyone is looking for in this town is a part-time fuck. And even the good ones of that are few and far between. No one wants to commit, just in case something better comes along. Look, I’m just a guilty as any guy and maybe that’s the problem. We’re all so focused on reaching our goals of fame and fortune, that we’re holding off on our relationships. A lot of us don’t want kids. For those of us that do, we’re just not ready yet. The only thing is, we’re all in our late twenties, and time is running out. This non-worry over children leads to a lackadaisical view on getting married. No one’s in a hurry. Not that you need to be. Right now, I couldn’t imagine getting married and starting a family.
And don’t even get me started on jobs. We’re all just working here until our “career” takes off which, of course, leads to a bunch of bitter, forty-something servers at your local Tony Roma’s. This town was built on part-time jobs. I mean, whoever heard of a city where you need three references, two years experience, and a friend who already works there to get a job slinging ribs?
